“If Betty Martin and Jack Morin had a love child, and she did sex work for decades - that's Artemisia."

~ Katherine Control, Seattle-based pro dominatrix

After being paid to become the sexual fantasy of thousands of clients in my former role as a sex worker and professional dominatrix, I used my lived experience to create a groundbreaking new approach to understanding the meaning and deeper value of sexual fantasies.

Instead of focusing on therapy-based models that tend to pathologise fantasies, I look at sexual fantasies through the lens of the magic of stories, play, somatics, and changing states of consciousness.

I developed The deVinery Method, a framework to guide you step-by-step through the art and psychology of bringing your sexual fantasies to life so you can access the fuller potential of where your innermost stories can take you!

I am now privileged to train some of the world's leading sexuality professionals, including sexologists, therapists, somatic and embodiment practitioners, educators, sex workers and BDSM practitioners.

I also guide intelligent, curious people on a journey of erotic self-discovery by helping them form an embodied relationship to their own desire and by uncovering the unique sexual narrative within their fantasies.  

I have an upcoming book: The Surprising Value of Sexual Fantasies. 

My theory is:

Sexual fantasies are the exact stories our ego needs to hear in order to let its guard down, so we can enter into the vulnerability of pleasure, connection, and sometimes even expanded states of consciousness.

Once you really grasp that sexual fantasies are just stories designed to create change in physical, emotional, and psychological states of being - and you understand how stories work - you suddenly have the tools to create real-life sexual experiences that create the same effects.

The job of the ego is to create and protect our sense of self - and keep us separate. In order to connect, our sense of self has to move out of the way so we can temporarily move from "I" to "we". Sexual fantasies are stories that include all our ego's concerns/fears and resolve them.

The deVinery Method of engaging sexual fantasies, opens us up to powerful, deeply fulfilling and sometimes profound erotic states of consciousness.

How I discovered the value of sexual fantasies.

With an insatiable curiosity for the human condition, I delved into the nature of sex for over 30 years, including a 12-year stint as a full-time sex worker, professional dominatrix and somatic sexologist.

I am grateful to have learned from many of the world's leading sexperts in the areas of somatics, trauma-informed sexual practice, BDSM, various spiritual sex traditions, sexology and more, and honestly, I would not be where I am today without them. But nothing taught me as much about the subtle workings of the erotic psyche as actually living out the sexual fantasies of thousands of people. 

Initially, I had no idea what I was doing, and I made all sorts of mistakes and encountered common problematic patterns. But I also stumbled across some really profound sexual experiences in circumstances I never would have thought such things would occur! 

I got really curious. I wanted to work out what was happening and play with them deliberately. As a trained anthropologist and ever-curious ponderer of the human condition, I just can't leave well enough alone. I have to work out the why and how behind things. 

Over time, I developed my own system, tools, practices, and an entire body and created The deVinery Method: 

• Understanding and deliberately engaging the internal force we call desire. 
• Using sexual fantasies as a way to uncover the key elements in each person's unique sexual wiring.
• Creating deliberate sexual play experiences tailored to the underlying key elements in each person's erotic psyche. 

Now I teach The deVinery Method to:

Therapists, sexologists, sexuality professionals and anyone wanting to be trained in erotic mastery or use the lens of the erotic for self-discovery. 

I am based in Australia but teach my body of work internationally online, to a handful of people at a time, so we can go deep. 

I do not teach the mechanics of how to perform various kink or sex acts like how to give a good blow job or tie someone up safely.

I teach the magic behind the curtain that transforms those acts into an entire experience that has the power to transport us somewhere inside ourselves, and allows us to share our secret inner worlds with each other through the theatre of embodied play.